Today's Good-bye: Day 2

Going to a liquid diet wasn't too bad because I snuck a few saltine crackers, and I kept my mind occupied so I didn't think about food. Having the study session with "Steve" helped out because my mind was on the material we've covered the past year. He doesn't eat (at least not during study sessions) and so I wasn't lured and tempted with food.

I thought how I would like to tell about what I'll experience Wesnesday morning, already imaginging it in my mind. How when I arrive I'll first change into the hospital attire and wait forever before they start the IV.

Starting an IV on me is a real chore because my veins were damaged by years of prednisone, and never fully recovered. So getting one in a good place takes some finesse and luck. I have a spot that I refer to as my "veing of plenty" but it is in the crook of my arm at the elbow and they don't like putting them there. They may have to as when I get nervous my veins roll and collapse easily.

Once that is going I wait some more, and if I'm lucky when the anesthesia guy or gal comes around to ask me questions, they may give me some sedation. The sedation always makes me feel like I'm looking through a fish bowl.

I'll still be awake and they will have me scoot onto the gurney in the OR, and the OR is always freakin' cold, like a meat locker. They will stick the heart monitor pads all over my body, and since I'm getting the epidural, they will then get that poked into my back.

Finally, when I'm all connected and some magic moment happens they will put me into a drug induced sleep with some kind of white liquid that I refer to as "milk of amnesia" which has a name that I can never remember because it is the last thing they tell me and so it is the first thing that I forget.

I will awake some time later and will then feel real heavy and shiver a lot, and slowly my brain will register my body (but not my legs) and I will feel like I've been hit by a truck. The pain medicine will work, but I'll still feel twinges of sharp pain, and once they determine I'm coherent enough I'll be taken to my room.

At some point during the waking up process, Pooky will come in and be with me. He will look strange to me because of the medication, but I will smile happily to see him and feel warm inside that he is by my side.

From there it will all be one moment at a time until life settles back into being normal.